Assuming is never good.
Up-sell is:  “would you like fries with that”?

Now let’s see a couple of great no-sells:

About ten yeas ago, I am walking through the Eaton Centre in Toronto. I had just finished a speech, so I was dressed, manicured, made up. I am coming around a women’s dress store on the second floor, and I am checking out the sale items. As I proceeded further into the store, a clerk said to me “you probably don’t want to go there because these suits are around $400”.  Well, thank you.  A sale lost for sure. By the way, both the salesclerk and I were of the same race.

And now comes the most recent one:

Oprah Winfrey in Switzerland in a fancy store that sells handbags:  The clerk who served Oprah decided that Oprah probably could not afford it, so even though Oprah pointed twice to a particular bag, $36,000 mind you, the woman declined twice to show it to her.  Apparently the clerk would have had to stretch or step up on something to pull it down. The clerk assumed one thing, and it was not that Oprah made $70 million last year alone. Oprah said in an interview that she will not buy it, because at this point she does not want this clerk to get the commission.

In both cases the clerks lost a sale for the store, and a commission for themselves.

It is not necessarily about race, it is about making an assumption.

Assuming is never good.


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What People are Saying

So simply, and so perfectly stated. You do such a great job of getting to the heart of the matter without a lot of unnecessary “fluff” — well done!
– Jodi Blackwood, Business Etiquette Specialist

I don’t mind being contacted by either e-mail or land line phone, and I agree about leaving a full message.
– Blessings from Dawn Clarke, Toronto

I’ve never forgotten your BMW message – Bread, Meal, Water.
I speak across the country and share that secret with everyone who wants to know that they are reaching for the right glass of water, or want to make sure that they put their roll on the right plate.
Thanks Adeodata, It’s a lesson everyone can remember!
– Donna Messer,
Author, Speaker, Mentor and Coach

Fantastic advice, Adeodata. Thank you.
– Debra McLaughlin
Image and Wardrobe Consultant
Images That Suit

Perfect… I like this one…and I agree wholeheartedly!
– Patti McGuigan
Financial Planner (CFP)

I enjoyed reading your previous articles. That was a great idea, to include the links to them at the bottom of the most recent newsletter. By the way, with regard to shaking hands, I wish more men (all men) would adhere to the protocol of NOT crushing a woman’s hand in a handshake. It has gotten much better than it was say, 20 years ago, but I still have my hand crushed the odd time. Ouch!
– Karen Phillips, Corporate Trainer

I guess I missed your newsletter on handshakes, but after reading some of the feedback people made, I went back into your archives to see what your comments were.  If I may add to the discussion (even though I am late)….  Many years ago my father warned me about shaking the hand of a friend of his who suffered horribly from arthritis. Firm strong grips when shaking hands caused this gentleman great pain, so dad suggested I allow him to take the lead as to how much pressure to put into our handshake, and I did. Since then, I have never assumed that shaking hands was just ‘shaking hands’ and have always curbed my enthusiasm and allowed the other person to take the lead just in case there was some medical reason for a less firm connection.
– Terry Carson, M.Ed., ACC